Blog number 381 **** 13 April 2009
We have a subscription to the New Yorker magazine. I just read another of their short stories. Pure pap.
The New Yorker magazine has a reputation amongst the American elite - especially those elite who reside in New York, as being THE literary epitome of writings. This reputation is undeserved.
Occasionally there is some good writing, but most often it is nothing but pretentious trash.
Even some of the cartoons are pretentious - kind of like the stand-up humor of Dennis Miller. A pretentious comic.
All that being said, I just finished a book called, "Water For Elephants" which was so good I really expected the end to fall apart, which often happens, but I was pleasantly surprised. Excellent ending. Excellent beginning. Excellent middle. Excellent book.
I'm fair.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Saturday, April 10, 2010
BETTER TO BET ON GETTING HIT BY LIGHTNING
Blog number 381 **** 09 April 2009
In Arizona, the most common saying they give us poor saps for playing the lottery is, "If you don't play, you can't win." Every time I hear that. I think, "If you don't play, you can't lose."
Today I got to wondering if that saying of mine really made sense, so I looked at it.
If you play the lottery, you can win. Very, very rarely. But. If you don't play the lottery, you can't lose! YOU CAN'T LOSE!
It's a choice between losing almost every time or never losing.
I think they need a new mantra.
In Arizona, the most common saying they give us poor saps for playing the lottery is, "If you don't play, you can't win." Every time I hear that. I think, "If you don't play, you can't lose."
Today I got to wondering if that saying of mine really made sense, so I looked at it.
If you play the lottery, you can win. Very, very rarely. But. If you don't play the lottery, you can't lose! YOU CAN'T LOSE!
It's a choice between losing almost every time or never losing.
I think they need a new mantra.
Friday, April 9, 2010
NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS
Blog number 380 **** 09 April 2009
Tonight I watched Miriam Garcia, a "reporter" for Fox "News," interviewing a "witness" to a shooting in a Walmart store reporting about the person she was interviewing, "Nick Garcia wasn't there, but he heard about it."
Miriam should maybe interview me about sighting the Lock Ness monster, 'cause I heard about that.
Tonight I watched Miriam Garcia, a "reporter" for Fox "News," interviewing a "witness" to a shooting in a Walmart store reporting about the person she was interviewing, "Nick Garcia wasn't there, but he heard about it."
Miriam should maybe interview me about sighting the Lock Ness monster, 'cause I heard about that.
Friday, March 19, 2010
GROPE MUCH?
Blog number 379 **** 19 March 2009
The author writing this book I am reading is traveling around China at the moment visiting the numerous factories being built around China. He's interviewing a guy at factory that makes rings and stays for women's brassieres.
The guy explains, "It helps women dress more beautifully. We have different sizes, too. Some are small and some are big. Some are really big." He gestured with his hands, forming the shape of an object roughly the size of a basketball. I couldn't imagine he was still talking about bras, so I figured those wires must have a different function.
"The ones that are that big," I asked, "what are they used for?"
"For Russians," he said.
The author writing this book I am reading is traveling around China at the moment visiting the numerous factories being built around China. He's interviewing a guy at factory that makes rings and stays for women's brassieres.
The guy explains, "It helps women dress more beautifully. We have different sizes, too. Some are small and some are big. Some are really big." He gestured with his hands, forming the shape of an object roughly the size of a basketball. I couldn't imagine he was still talking about bras, so I figured those wires must have a different function.
"The ones that are that big," I asked, "what are they used for?"
"For Russians," he said.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
MISSED IT BY THAT MUCH
Blog number 378 **** 18 March 2009
I was telling my wife about this book I'm reading written by a guy traveling through China. I tell her about this Chinese guy and his uncle building a factory with the help of an architect and a contractor and on a piece of scratch paper they designed a 21,000 square foot factory in an hour and four minutes. I tell my wife that you couldn't do that in America.
She says, "Yeah. They'd be afraid of lawsuits from mistakes and such."
I say, "Our culture's greatest mass production is fear."
She says, "You ought to put that in your Blog.
I say, "I would, but I'm afraid to."
She says, "Why are you afraid?"
Zoom! Whoosh!
I was telling my wife about this book I'm reading written by a guy traveling through China. I tell her about this Chinese guy and his uncle building a factory with the help of an architect and a contractor and on a piece of scratch paper they designed a 21,000 square foot factory in an hour and four minutes. I tell my wife that you couldn't do that in America.
She says, "Yeah. They'd be afraid of lawsuits from mistakes and such."
I say, "Our culture's greatest mass production is fear."
She says, "You ought to put that in your Blog.
I say, "I would, but I'm afraid to."
She says, "Why are you afraid?"
Zoom! Whoosh!
Thursday, March 11, 2010
I USED TO BE OLD, BUT I AIN'T ANY MORE
Blog number 377 **** 11 March 2009
Our 65" TV busted for the third time a few weeks ago and now Mitsubishi is giving us a new one. What a great company! A few days ago a woman from Mitsubishi called and said they were going to pick up the old TV Thursday.
Today.
She asked if there would be someone here to help carry it out to the truck. I said, "sure."
She sounded a little doubtful. Like, "Are you sure?" I could see where it would be important to know if someone was here to help, 'cause one guy ain't gonna load that sucker in a truck all by his self. So I ignored the implied skepticism. Never thought any more about it at the time.
The guy to pick up the TV calls today and says he will be here between ten and two. I say OK and he asks if there will be anybody here to help him load it in the truck. Again, I say, "yes." I again hear doubt. He wants me to be sure.
Later he calls from his truck and says he will be there in a few minutes and WILL THERE BE ANYBODY THERE TO HELP HIM LOAD THE TV?
Do I sound like I am trying to trick him?
So he comes over, I help him carry it out to the truck and when we set it down, he says, "You're pretty strong for as old as you are." Now at first, that made me feel pretty good. proud, maybe. And shortly thereafter I'm wondering why I felt that, but I liked it, so I didn't fight it.
I also began wondering about why he said that - like he was surprised. Did I look too old to lift half of that TV? I also wondered if I looked that old, because I know how old you have to look for anyone to wonder about a man's ability to carry his weight, so to speak.
I also began wondering if they have been talking about this old man here being too old to help with the carrying and maybe that's what all the doubt about my helping was about.
"I don't think that old man is going to be any help at all."
"Damn! I can't handle that thing all by myself. Someone's going to have to come with me."
"Ask him again if he can help."
"You ask him."
"No, you."
"No. You."
End of act one.
When the repairman comes, I usually am doing my jigsaw puzzles while he is here and my unnamed wife handles everything else. Maybe he thought I was on my last legs or something. Which reminds me.
The last time he was here, when it came time to pay him, I jokingly told my wife to give him one of the good checks, which he of course heard. For the first time ever, when she gave him the check, he asked to see her driver's license and he wrote down the number. That was the fifth time (I think) that we have given him a check and the only time he asked for a driver's license.
Fun day that was. And this one. What would I do without my fellow humans sent to entertain me?
Our 65" TV busted for the third time a few weeks ago and now Mitsubishi is giving us a new one. What a great company! A few days ago a woman from Mitsubishi called and said they were going to pick up the old TV Thursday.
Today.
She asked if there would be someone here to help carry it out to the truck. I said, "sure."
She sounded a little doubtful. Like, "Are you sure?" I could see where it would be important to know if someone was here to help, 'cause one guy ain't gonna load that sucker in a truck all by his self. So I ignored the implied skepticism. Never thought any more about it at the time.
The guy to pick up the TV calls today and says he will be here between ten and two. I say OK and he asks if there will be anybody here to help him load it in the truck. Again, I say, "yes." I again hear doubt. He wants me to be sure.
Later he calls from his truck and says he will be there in a few minutes and WILL THERE BE ANYBODY THERE TO HELP HIM LOAD THE TV?
Do I sound like I am trying to trick him?
So he comes over, I help him carry it out to the truck and when we set it down, he says, "You're pretty strong for as old as you are." Now at first, that made me feel pretty good. proud, maybe. And shortly thereafter I'm wondering why I felt that, but I liked it, so I didn't fight it.
I also began wondering about why he said that - like he was surprised. Did I look too old to lift half of that TV? I also wondered if I looked that old, because I know how old you have to look for anyone to wonder about a man's ability to carry his weight, so to speak.
I also began wondering if they have been talking about this old man here being too old to help with the carrying and maybe that's what all the doubt about my helping was about.
"I don't think that old man is going to be any help at all."
"Damn! I can't handle that thing all by myself. Someone's going to have to come with me."
"Ask him again if he can help."
"You ask him."
"No, you."
"No. You."
End of act one.
When the repairman comes, I usually am doing my jigsaw puzzles while he is here and my unnamed wife handles everything else. Maybe he thought I was on my last legs or something. Which reminds me.
The last time he was here, when it came time to pay him, I jokingly told my wife to give him one of the good checks, which he of course heard. For the first time ever, when she gave him the check, he asked to see her driver's license and he wrote down the number. That was the fifth time (I think) that we have given him a check and the only time he asked for a driver's license.
Fun day that was. And this one. What would I do without my fellow humans sent to entertain me?
Thursday, March 4, 2010
ANYHOW, I REMEMBER ME
Blog number 376 **** 04 March 2009
I am 78 years old (79 in April). In the past three weeks, I have lost three wrist watches and a pair of glasses. I also during that period, lost a beef dip sandwich we got from Mimi's that Teresa found in my closet hanging on the rack in a plastic bag. She found it by simply following the stench from the rotten meat. And, a couple of weeks ago I was looking everywhere for my bib overalls until I discovered I was wearing them.
This was not all the memory problems I have had lately, they are just the highlights. Usually I find the stuff I lose if I look long enough, but it now seems like I have entered a new phase where the things disappear forever. I blame alternate realities.
As my wife says, "what's a mother to do?"
I am 78 years old (79 in April). In the past three weeks, I have lost three wrist watches and a pair of glasses. I also during that period, lost a beef dip sandwich we got from Mimi's that Teresa found in my closet hanging on the rack in a plastic bag. She found it by simply following the stench from the rotten meat. And, a couple of weeks ago I was looking everywhere for my bib overalls until I discovered I was wearing them.
This was not all the memory problems I have had lately, they are just the highlights. Usually I find the stuff I lose if I look long enough, but it now seems like I have entered a new phase where the things disappear forever. I blame alternate realities.
As my wife says, "what's a mother to do?"
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